I just got done watching the second season of The Colony made by the Discovery Channel. Basically they take a group of strangers and put them into a post apocalyptic type setting and make them ban together to survive for 50+ days. They "colonists" must figure out everything to survive from water to drink to food to eat, shelter and more.
Throughout the entire show in both seasons the colonists have to deal with attacks on their shelter and people trying to take away their valuable resources, even abduction of their fellow colonists. Quickly you begin to see the colonists strengths and weaknesses, even to the point of wanting to yell at the tv when they do something stupid (yes I know it sounds silly but you really can get immersed in what is going on with them).
The point of this is not to push a tv show, though I do believe that everyone should watch both seasons. The point of my writing currently is that through watching the show I witnessed in-fighting with the colonists over petty things like asking something too many times which made the other person feel like they were being attacked or being upset because someone didn't wake the other up to go pick berries.
In the end the colonists still had a bond that wouldn't be broken, they were a family. It made me think back to my own Lifestyle family and the BDSM world as a whole. First it made me think about all of the in-fighting that can be seen and read about with other communities. Communities reporting each other to the authorities simply because they don't like each other or communities simply doing the "we're better than they are, don't talk to them" type attitude.
When it all comes down to it, we are all part of the same colony; we're all trying to keep our shelters together and learn from the same resources. Why does that have to lead to fighting? Just because someone boils their water differently doesn't mean that they're the enemy, they're just different. Our Lifestyle is based on the fact that we're all "different" otherwise it wouldn't have to stay secret.
Finally it brings me to my own community. Sure we have our problems, our in-fighting every once and a while, but when it comes down to it we're still family. We do our best to keep each other as safe as we possibly can, not just physically, but mentally as well. Granted I haven't experienced other communities first hand, but I know simply from word of mouth that our community is one of a kind and I'm proud to be a part of it.
To anyone from the other communities that may read this, I welcome your insight and friendship. Please, come and be a part of our family. After all, the more the merrier right? Again, this isn't to say that any one community/group/etc has the one "true" way of doing things, it is in fact the opposite. It is to say that we should all learn from each other and pool our resources so that we may be stronger as a Lifestyle.
Whether you are Leather, Old Guard, New Guard, Gorean, or any other form of "kinkster" live well and remember that sharing and patience can go a long way.
Ignixia is an international kink and alternative sexuality educator. The following blog entries range from educational information and resources from her classes to daily musings had on things occurring in the world.