If you ask BDSM practitioners around the world what makes them different from crazed killers they'll all respond with the same answer: "consent." The next answer that will most likely follow is "safety." What do these things mean though and how do they apply to BDSM?
Well, consent is a fairly simple matter in principle: if someone says "yes" they want to do something, they have consented. If they say anything other than that (ie: no, maybe, I don't know, etc.) then they haven't consented to the activity, which then becomes abuse rather than kinky bedroom fun.
Yes means yes, and only yes means yes.
Hi. My name is Kara and I'm not an addict.
I never went through "the phase" where drug-use was appealing (including excessive alcohol consumption) and to be completely honest, there was a time when I resented those who did become addicted to one substance or another. I didn't get it. I didn't understand the appeal to use in the first place and more than that I didn't understand why people couldn't just stop. It seemed pretty clear to me, if you don't want to do something, don't.
Ignixia is an international kink and alternative sexuality educator. The following blog entries range from educational information and resources from her classes to daily musings had on things occurring in the world.